Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. ~John 8:32

Tag Archives: Jesus


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Was Jesus Too Busy to Talk to His Dad?

If you were walking and talking with Jesus in the flesh, can you imagine his telling you that he’d really like to spend more time with the Father, but He’s just too busy today? Oh, the people who need me today…it’s just overwhelming! I just don’t have time to be still and know that He is my God. What He might instead say to you is, Oh, the people who need me today…it would be overwhelming were I not first to be still and know that He is my God!

Can you imagine Jesus telling you he has a secret sin, and no matter how hard he tries, he just can’t get rid of it? That could have been him since he was truly human. However, that is not who He was. It seems to me the reason he didn’t become that person is that he spent so much time with the Father.

Staying busy has been one of my “greatest” accomplishments in life. Could it be the evil one wants to entice me to accomplish “good things” under my own power? Perhaps in that way he can keep me too busy and distracted to become who God created me to be. Instead, I want my life to reflect the power of God’s love in my every thought, word, and action.

The only way for my life to be a reflection of His love is to continually listen to Him. If I stay too busy doing first one project and then another in a seemingly endless assembly line of projects, then I’ll have great difficulty listening to Him.

footprints-JesusJesus wants me to talk with Him and walk with Him and learn from that everyday walk how to be like Him. If I want to figure out who I am and why I’m here, I must first figure out who He really is and let Him transform me to be more and more like Him.

Jesus not only spent time with the Father, but he also spent a lot of time with messy people. We’re all messy people, but as we say in Celebrate Recovery, God can take our mess and turn it into His message! We’re not allowing Him to do that when we don’t spend time in His presence. Only when you and I are as serious as Jesus about spending time with our “daddy” and attuning our lives to His will—only then will we receive the power from His precious Holy Spirit to accomplish the seemingly impossible task of loving messy people.

Jesus is genuine, humble, loving, and kind. He shows true love to all of us even as he tells us things that are sometimes hard to hear. We can do the same for others but only when we take the time to talk with Him, to walk with Him, to let Him transform us into looking and acting just as He does.

This week post a card on your bathroom mirror with three simple items that will help you on this journey:

  1. Ask Jesus to give you a greater desire to become like Him.
    And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:18
  2. Spend as much morning, noon and/or evening time as you can reading/studying God’s Word, even if that’s only a few minutes each day.
    Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long.     Psalm 119:97
  3. Spend time praising God and praying for the needs of at least three people every day this week.
    For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil. 1 Peter 3:12


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I Need Recovery!

But everything exposed by the light becomes visible and everything that is illuminated becomes a light. Ephesians 5:13

It occurred to me the other day how low my self-confidence really is.  It caught me off guard and reminded me just how much I need continual recovery, not only from my childhood abuse but from my own thinking.

I was getting into the shower when I discovered there was no hot water. I checked the hot water tank and sure enough it was off. So I began to reignite it by following the very specific instructions on the tank. It may seem silly but this was a huge accomplishment! I am very insecure and have many “obsessive thinking” types of fear. I was terrified the entire time that the hot water tank was going to blow up in my face. I had gone to lengths in my mind how I would try to escape the flames and save my children. Ever do that? I hope I’m not the only one!

I shared this story with my mom and a few days later she reminded me of our family history, our family’s disease. She planted the seed that my lack of confidence in myself to perform a simple task is deeply rooted in my behavior and thinking that has been passed down from generations through alcoholism.

12417535_10154031575859933_1855565112789213995_nI have been in recovery from my childhood sexual abuse for the past 6 years. Although I have overcome a lot, I still have much more work ahead of me, work that requires a lifetime of attention and yet, I will likely die before fully healing from it all. Some things require Jesus’ return to have full resolution and justice.

For my family, alcoholism was a generational disease on both my mother’s and my father’s side, along with physical, sexual, and emotional abuse. Generational disease, or as the Bible refers to it, generational sin (Deuteronomy 5:9), is a very real cycle passed down by our parents and grandparents through learned behavior.

In order for the cycle to be broken, someone has to be willing to stop the previous behavior patterns and choose something different. This requires one thing: to speak the truth. It’s simply said but a very lonely, not-so-traveled road. Most of the time, it is hard for other members of the family who are not quite ready for the truth.

In my family the brave person who chose to step into the light of truth was my mother. After she began recovery it was like a permission slip for me to do the same. I could not wait to finally start talking about what we never talked about. As difficult as the truth was and as painful as it was for my other family members to hear, it felt much better than keeping the truth inside where it ate away at me daily.  I began to slowly realize why I was in so much pain and why I made such poor choices.

Jesus meant it when he said, “the truth will set you free.” It did for me. Not everyone was in the same place as me when I began recovery, and many of my relationships were strained. However, through the strength Christ gives when you choose this journey, I was able to hold firm boundaries while maintaining a loving perspective and acceptance of where they were in their lives.

The truth is funny, though; it has a way of making itself known without demanding attention or bullying its way in.  It reveals itself with such incredible timing in grand, undeniable ways. That’s because God is the truth and His Son, the light. When we choose to walk in God’s truth hand in hand with His son lighting the way, it ends up spreading and affecting everything it touches, including the relationships surrounding us.

The truth hurts, but only temporarily. Through it I have reached a place of acceptance and forgiveness and will continue to move through past hurts from my childhood and adulthood. I know I have a long road ahead of me, but I have put many miles behind me already because I’m not doing it alone but with a Savior who understands my pain. Remember, Christ became like us so we could become like Him.

On days when recovery is hard and my character defects are overpowering me, I remind myself of God’s promises for my future. John shares with us in Revelation 22:2, the new city of Jerusalem, the streets of gold and the tree of life that bears new fruit each month. Then he says, “the leaves will be for the healing of the nations.” Our God knows that our pain is great, so great that we will continue to need healing even in our eternity. I pray we keep hope in that we will be completely healed one day.


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Beautiful Pain

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” Romans 8:18

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She was born in mid-September at the Med in downtown Memphis. It was fast. She looked perfect. But hidden just beneath the surface was a tiny heart that was, oh, so broken!

Olivia Ann.

She has suffered more pain than most would ever endure in a lifetime. But like Jesus, her pain was not in vain. She had a very complicated heart defect. It required many surgeries that held no guarantees. By the time she was two years old, her tiny, fragile heart could no longer keep pace with her growing body, and she was placed on the heart transplant list.

Like Olivia’s heart, broken and underdeveloped, my spiritual heart was in the same condition. It wasn’t long after she entered the world that I began to understand some of the characteristics of God that my pain had kept me from seeing.

You see, I was broken from my childhood—scarred from abuse and living in a constant state of torment. I carried with me the pain that I had suffered and the choices I had made based on that abuse. Being witness to Olivia’s life and watching God faithfully restore her with a heart transplant gave me insight into why suffering is a beautiful part of life.

Jesus’s suffering on the cross was tremendous, bloody, the worst. Yet the beauty found just outside that pain is awesome, cleansing, the best. It’s life wrapped up in the highest of glory.

Olivia’s surgeries were terrifying, gruesome, the worst. But worth all the agony. She’s alive because of them. Her pain was my calling from God. His outpouring to reach me. I believe it was His attempt to restore my heart as well.

It’s been six years since Olivia received her new heart. After years of walking hand in hand with Christ through the pain of my childhood, I have discovered the deep connection between tremendous, life-changing pain, the daily pain of dying to yourself, and the gospel. Paul says it best in Romans 8:17: since we are “co-heirs with Christ,” we can experience his sufferings and share in the glory of that suffering!

I want to be transformed through the pains of life. That transformation brings purpose to the pain. As Philippians 3:10 says: “I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participate in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death….”

Sarah Apa

Sarah Apa


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Jumping Off the Wheel

“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.” Matthew 6:24

Do you ever feel like “a confused hamster”? Would you like to get off that wheel?

girl-headphones-reducedWhen our boys were young, we went to a science museum that had an exhibit about sound. I sat in a booth and put on a set of headphones in which a different person was speaking on each side. No matter how hard I tried, I could not listen to both people at the same time. Our brains simply don’t work that way. I could listen to one side and then the other, but not both at the same time.

In Boundaries for Leaders by Henry Cloud, he states, “The research says when we multitask, our brains run in a hampered state. Basically multitasking reduces an astronaut’s brain to that of a confused hamster.”

One morning I was feeling particularly stressed and the day had only just begun. I wondered why reading the Bible verse on my bathroom mirror wasn’t helping. Then I saw myself in the mirror. I was brushing my teeth with one hand and brushing my hair with the other. I immediately put down my hairbrush and slowed down, thankful that I hadn’t confused the brushes!

When we try to keep our eyes on Jesus and on the evil one at the same time, we fall short. Our Lord wants our full attention, as does any loving father. The evil one wants to divert our attention from our Father. Nothing makes him happier than drawing us away from God’s will for our lives.

Let’s make a commitment right now that we will not give him a foothold by trying to divide our attention between him and Him. Jesus deserves our full attention. His heart pines for us to look toward Him so that He can lead us closer to our Father.

Cindy

Cindy Phiffer


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Good Thing I’ve Got a Solid Foundation!

stone-wall-reducedI will show you what it’s like when someone comes to me, listens to my teaching, and then follows it. It is like a person building a house who digs deep and lays the foundation on solid rock. When the floodwaters rise and break against the house, it stands firm because it is well built. Luke 6:47-48 (NLT)

I think it’s ironic that I’m introducing myself at a time when I’m struggling to keep my identity in focus. I feel like the rug has been pulled out from underneath me and my mind is spinning. But I still know one thing for sure, Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior, and He never changes. I can trust that Jesus will never leave me.

I am from the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains in Eastern Kentucky. My family tree includes Irish immigrants, Native Americans, Civil War oppositionists, moonshiners, unrepentant sinners, talented musicians, natural medicine healers, faithful Christians, productive farmers, coal miners, military veterans, and story tellers.

And my family tree is not too healthy right now. For the past three years, a big part of my life has been serving as the guardian for my disabled mother and she just died. Momma had a stroke that left her with brain damage so severe that she was unable to walk or talk. But for me, the worst part was that she couldn’t communicate with us in any way: she couldn’t read or write or type or point to pictures or push buttons or nod or shake her head reliably. I think she felt trapped in her body and was just waiting to die. I felt sad and depressed the whole three years.

My father died suddenly in 1994 from a massive heart attack. His death was a shock. Is it because it was 20 years ago that his death doesn’t seem as bad as Momma’s death less than a month ago? I was sad and missed him, but I was younger and newly married and had so much to look forward to.

My own health isn’t the greatest. I have a few health issues related to my lifestyle, my age and my family history: arthritis, diabetes, obesity, and cardiovascular disease. My default behavior is to eat something to make me feel better. My brain seems to always be “on” and the noise in my mind is constant but quiets down when I’m eating.

Right now I feel scatterbrained. What an appropriate word to express what is going on inside my head…I can’t seem to focus my thoughts. If you ask me a question, it doesn’t matter how simple, I feel lost. My memory will just go blank and I can’t think of what to say. At other times, I have too much to say and provide much more information than is necessary or appropriate. This is not like me and probably is because I’m under stress right now.

Stress? Everybody has stress. I’ve had stress in the past and came through just fine. I know how to trust Jesus to carry me as I’m working through all this stress. Let me make a list (because making lists brings me comfort):

  1. Momma died and now there’s a will to probate and final guardianship reports to be filed.
  2. My only sibling, my younger brother, was in a freak accident last Saturday night and has 2nd and 3rd degree burns on his feet. He’s in a burn unit receiving an experimental wound covering because he has diabetes and is not a candidate for a skin graft.
  3. My only child, a son, will be a senior in high school starting next week. He turned 18 last week and has to register for the draft. He plans to attend college in another town and move away from home next year.
  4. The division in which I work is experiencing many retirements, promotions and organizational changes. My office was physically moved to a new location last week. I’m working out of boxes and trying to settle in while still being productive.
  5. My husband and I will celebrate our 24th wedding anniversary this year. I’m almost to the point where I can admit my expectations as a new bride were unreasonable. Yet I’m still working on molding him into the potential man I expected him to become.
  6. I recently placed membership at the West Campus of North Boulevard church of Christ that meets at the new Farmer’s Market location on John Rice Boulevard. It’s new and growing and I’m getting connected.
  7. I have a routine of going to the YMCA at 5am to exercise in their indoor pool. The surprising announcement of its permanent closing means I’ve got to find a replacement pool. It depresses me because I know there’s no other pool available at 5 a.m. so this will require changing my entire morning schedule. I do not establish new habits easily.
  8. The Celebrate Recovery Step Study Group I’ve been attending every Friday night has completed and I’m not sure how to replace that weekly “port in the storm.”

 

I feel I have truly come unglued and qualify to contribute to this blog. I don’t necessarily think adding to my list of stressful changes by starting something new is going to be easy, but it is exciting. And I’m stepping out in faith knowing I have a solid foundation.

Ramona

Ramona Taylor